Here are a few EASY ways you can assist me in my relentless battle against obsolescence and irrelevance:
1) Buy the actual CD. For yourself and for all of your friends and family members. You can rest assured they don't already own copies! You can do that at one of my live shows, or directly from my website. If you've got a table with one leg slightly shorter than the others, this will do the trick!
2) Stream the album (repeatedly) on the music platform of your choice. On mute. Yeah, I get literally a FRACTION of a penny when you do that, but the more plays I get, the better my algorithms will be and I'll show up in more places. And if enough of you folks do it, I can buy myself a stick of pre-used gum.
3) Like, share, playlist -- all the kind of stuff you can do on a streaming service that will help my numbers.
4) Tell your friends. Tell your enemies. Tell your friends' enemies. Tell your frenemies. Launch a Presidential campaign on Twitter while using my album cover as your backdrop.
Thank you in advance for all of your love and support!
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